Momma's Back!

I'm back! It's been a wild, wild week and a half. One I will never forget. I want to thank each of you for your comments, prayers and support. I really could not have gotten through these last days without them. What a blessing to have you in my life.

The babies are all doing well. I got to hold Noah for about and hour and a half yesterday! The nurse said that I probably won't be able to hold him every day just because some of the nurses will not be comfortable moving him after just having surgery but I think it's so important for him to be held and feel the warmth of his mommy! He had some secretions from his ostomy which is a great sign. They put an ostomy bag on him last night to catch that. Our next hurdle is to have him start to tolerate slow feeds and absorb those enough to grow for the next surgery. I am praying this will happen quickly and that God will continue to heal Noah's body.

Mom and Noah

Sophia is off of her oxygen and donning her pretty clothes that Miss Jen got for her - thank you, Jen! The nurses love all the outfits you got for the babies, sometimes I think they are playing dress up all day because I'll come in to find them in new outfits just hours after the first one was put on.

Sophia in her Purple Frog Jammies



Finn is still on a bit of oxygen but should be coming off of that soon. He keeps taking it out of his nose so I think he's trying to tell us something.

Dad & Finn

Cohen is really doing well with the breastfeeding. I think he'll catch on after a few more days. It's so fun to have him in an open crib, it makes it a lot easier to go in and just scoop him up.

Auntie Em & Cohen

My sister, Emalee, has been in town since Wednesday night and has been a huge help. Not only getting things done around the house but to make me feel more comfortable around the babies in the NICU. I have been a little scared to just go in and take them out of the isolettes, but she swiftly pulls them out, wraps them up and loves on them. It has given me the confidence to do the same which helps so much to make them feel more like their mom and less like a daily visitor.

I knew this was going to be a roller coaster and that it might be one that was a little tough to ride but I had no idea that I would want to jump off so badly. I was looking for that exit the first couple of days as I watched my babies struggle to survive. I really didn't think I was cut out for this or that I could handle it. It's amazing now to see how God will give you the strength if you allow Him to. I wrote this poem below a while ago and I revisited it this week - reminding myself the kind of mother I want to be. I hope you'll enjoy it and see that sometimes the tough times in life are there to bring you closer to who God wants you to be.

“Breaking Place”
Take me to the place
Where You need me to break
Take me to the place
Where my heart can feel Your face
Lord, hold me tightly
As I peer over the edge
Of this ledge that You’ve brought me to
I want to understand
Help me to know
That You will be my wings
As I jump over this canyon
And go forward for my King
I am here to serve You, Lord
The leader of my life
I will go where You will guide
I will live to testify

Love to all of you! - Mari