It seems like my mind is constantly in a fog. There are lots of distractions around here and I am constantly being pulled in many different ways.
Sophia will follow me around saying "Mommy, hair?" "Mommy, hair?" "Mommy, hair?" She'll persist for an hour just for me to look down to see that all she wants is for me to put her little pigtails back in for her.
Cohen will walk around the house and request over and over "Up.....up.....up....up..." to see if I'll give in and finally pick him up. Which will then create a domino effect of three more little ones insisting, "Mommy, up..."
Finn likes to ask to go outside and then once he's outside he likes to ask to come back inside. It's to see if I'll pay attention to him and open and shut the door for him for as long as he sees fit.
Noah's new one is "Mommy, look! or "Mommy, watch!" No matter if he's just sitting on the couch or about to go down the slide - he wants to see if I'll look his way - all eyes on him.
I've gotten really good at tuning out the requests so I don't start a domino effect and so I can try to stay on course and get my next task done. The problem with this is that I've started to tune out that one clear voice who should be directing my path throughout the day. God, the Holy Spirit, my BFF; I'm sad to say that voice has been giving very clear instructions lately and I've simply been ignoring it and going on to the next item on my checklist.
The God who has given me the miracles that these four little ones are, the God who provides in abundance for our family of six on just one income, the same God who created this entire universe. How could I just ignore what He is asking of me? How did I make His plan so insignificant and my pursuit for order and pleasure so much better? I let my mind get clouded by everything around me. I fill my schedule with meaningless tasks and activities that leave me too tired and worn out to do what He's asking. I get in a hurry and forget to really listen and I justify that there's always tomorrow. I don't want that to be my life. As our pastor often says, God's plan is not always easier but always so much better than our own plans. I've got to choose who it is I am living for and then learn to listen to that clear yet quiet voice in order to live it out.
You must fear the Lord your God and worship him and cling to him. Your oaths must be in his name alone. He alone is your God, the only one who is worthy of your praise, the one who has done these mighty miracles that you have seen with your own eyes.
Deuteronomy 10:20 & 21
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